Foxhole Symphony
Foxhole Symphony
Wrestling with God, Part II: The Fight for Authentic Living
Dive into an enlightening discussion on the importance of authentic community among men and the struggles that often lead us to a deeper connection with ourselves, others and God. In this episode, we explore how isolation can create an illusion of strength and independence, but ultimately, it is the bonds forged through shared experiences that empower us to thrive. We unpack the idea that wrestling with our faith isn't just a personal journey, but a collective experience that is best navigated within the warmth of a supportive Christian community.
Get ready to hear real-life stories of men who have faced their challenges head-on, learned to lean on one another, and discovered the life-changing power of accountability and openness. We encourage listeners to embrace discomfort and continually ask God what He is teaching you through your circumstances. The conversation serves as a reminder that we are not alone in this journey; we are called to lift each other up and work towards healing together.
Join us for this powerful exploration, and don't forget to share your thoughts and experiences. We'd love to hear from you! Subscribe, and follow us as we continue to build a symphony of support and encouragement in the foxhole.
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Welcome to Foxhole Symphony, a podcast about the transformational value of men in authentic community.
Speaker 2:In our foxhole. Men are equipped to build relationships that foster belonging, accountability and growth.
Speaker 1:Stop believing the lie that you can thrive in isolation and instead join us on the journey from broken to whole.
Speaker 3:Hello everyone. They call me the maestro and we are back in the foxhole where we actively pursue belonging, accountability and growth through authentic relationships. No masks, no agendas, just iron, sharpening iron. Steve and Mark are in the foxhole today and they are digging in for round two. You know what time it is? Get comfortable, open your notes app and let's get this symphony started.
Speaker 2:Welcome back to Foxhole Symphony Podcast. I'm Sarge here with my good friend Mark. How are you?
Speaker 1:I'm good brother. How are you? I'm always glad to see you with the palm tree swaying in the background. You dog.
Speaker 2:Yes, you as well. Good, we had we're coming off an incredible episode with Josh Ugalde, duro, duro, duro, and we are we're going to have part two, you know, part two of wrestling with God, and it's just interesting, right, how God works. I mean, we have this, you know, this great conversation with Josh, and then we find ourselves in the midst of scriptures and a devotional, you know, and, and all these different things. God's talking to us about staying in the fight, right, and, and, and, and wrestling with God, and, and, of course, you know the circumstances of our lives. So God's up to something. Let's jump in and, you know, let's maybe start with, I guess, some, some things going on, right, I mean, let's talk a little bit about the fights that we're in and what's happening, and then we can maybe jump to, you know, some scripture and devotional thoughts and see where God takes us.
Speaker 1:I'm in with you, but isn't there like a, even a monopoly? You can, you know, go around jail, right? You get a, a do not pass, go, do not right.
Speaker 2:Get out of jail free.
Speaker 1:Yeah, can I don't? Don't we get one of those?
Speaker 2:as believers. No, sorry, do not pass go, do not collect 200 straight to jail, bro um I went isn't there like a gold willie wonka golden ticket, right, isn't there?
Speaker 1:yeah?
Speaker 2:you know, yeah, I mean, if only life were that way. And yet, god's in it all. Right, god is in it all. And you know, particularly in the fight, and he, he, he brings us right where he needs us, right where he wants us. Uh, and that is either to work in our own hearts or to use us to impact others, right? And so, um, you know, we, we know that to be true, we've experienced that and even are experiencing that now, aren't we?
Speaker 1:Yeah, the fight of our lives, right? I mean, josh was great and his perspective, I think, was beautiful. I hope, you know, people appreciated that as much as we did. And here we are. Um, I think it's appropriate to say that this is different for every man. We all have different tolerance levels for the fight, for the stress, for the anxiety, the uncertainty, the fear, the doubt, whatever it is that's attacking us or coming at us, and some of it's worldly and all of it is of the enemy, in my opinion, who wants to distract us and keep us from being effective fighters for God, because there's so much to do for him. But while I, you know, I have tried to end every one of these 87 episodes with one word what is it? Peace, right, right, and I don't say it lightly, it is a quest. Shalom, shalom, right. I'm in it for wanting that for you, for me, for anyone listening, both of you. Peace matters in what we do.
Speaker 1:I think, after processing this today and, as you mentioned, wrestling with it, I'm a little spoiled. I don't think I've been in a good fight lately. So, okay, I it, I'm a little spoiled, you know, I don't think I've been in a good fight lately, so, okay, I mean I'm, I'm willing to admit that. You know I haven't, you know, sold everything and gone to Africa. You know I haven't done any street evangelism lately, whatever it is that's. That's a little stressful, although street evangelism wouldn't be stressful for me at all but I haven't really reached out there and put myself on the line like you have in the stress that you have. But I, I do have worldly things going on around me now that are trying man, they're, they're distracting, they're dark, yeah, and're dark yeah, and you know they're out of my control, out of my control and I have been spent.
Speaker 1:I spent the last two, three weeks just trying to give the Heisman to this whole situation, going la, la, la la, can't see you, can't hear you, to stay over there, right, and it's been mildly effective. I mean, I was sick for a bit of it, um, I was had other distractions, you know, good ones at work and things like that. But, as you mentioned earlier, I got hit right between the eyes by our friend Justin camp, who tends to either hit me in the solar plexus or right there, right on the noggin right, justin said ever been in the middle of something tough, prayed for rescue and heard nothing, ever questioned God. Why aren't you rescuing me? And without going into detail right now, justin basically says take a deep breath. You might be exactly where God wants you.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's, that's a tough pill, bro. Yeah, well, it's interesting. You were talking about peace earlier. Right, peace be still Right.
Speaker 2:And uh, in the midst of the storm, in the midst of the storm, and, um, you know, we me draw near to me, right, right, um, and so you know, uh, some storms of our, of our own making, you know, and and and others, uh, are, are, you know, uh, god led right, I mean, I you again that just the red sea moments, red sea seasons, like you and I've talked about, right, like you know, the Israelites, I mean, you know, following the pillar of fire, following God, like you know, to the promised land, and not the direct route, right, the indirect route, you know, to the edge of the red sea, where you know the armies are breathing down their neck and they're going to, they're going to, they're toast right, only for God to reveal his power and glory, and you know majesty and love and all the things, and the parting of the sea. And so you know, man, that's our God, that's our God, right and and so working in and through it all, um, for his purposes and for his glory. And so we were foolish to think that he's not in it, right, like God, why. You know why me, why this, like I mean, of course, that's human nature, but to acknowledge you know it's, it's like God, where are you? Well, right there, right, right there with us. You know exactly where he's brought us, exactly where he's led us.
Speaker 2:We're asking the wrong questions. I sometimes ask the wrong questions, not why am I here, or how did you get me here, or where are you, but what is it you want to do through this? What are you doing? You know, and that was, and I'll be honest, not because of any you know, wisdom or or enlightenment, but those were questions I was asking, you know, 15 months ago, as things were, you know, really coming to a head and falling apart and, um, you know, personally and professionally, and he didn't ask God, like God, what are you?
Speaker 2:What are you up to here? Like, what are you up to? Because there's way too many things happening simultaneously that are altering my life for you to not be in it. Like, there's just too many things. This is not coincidence, right? So, like God, what are you doing? Where are you leading? And help me to be still enough to hear it and to see it now in my, in my shortcomings. I wanted to know the whole plan, and that's, that's not God's way to show us the whole plan, right. He just says be obedient, take the next step. Okay, lord, what's the next step? Right? And so anyway, by the way, you're not alone in that.
Speaker 1:I just want to be clear Even our Bible heroes got it kind of step. Moses got it step by step, abraham got it step by step, jacob got it step by step. Right, paul Paul, that Jacob got accepted. Right, paul Paul, you're going here, right? Yeah, right, exactly. I get a feeling that some of the things they slowed down and listened for may not have been exactly what they wanted to hear at the moment, such as okay, we'll play Jeopardy.
Speaker 2:I need you to sacrifice your son.
Speaker 1:Right, pardon me, hello, hello Right. Your son, pardon me, hello Right. So so I just want to. I'm teasing a little, but I'm sorry to interrupt you. You're doing great. I just those. What is going on here moments is a great God question. What are you up to, big guy Right? My father, my Holy father, what are you up to, big guy right?
Speaker 2:My father, my Holy father, what are you doing? Why is that important to ask him? Why is it important to know, right? Well, because we're human, you know. I think again, just to acknowledge that he's, that he's in it, acknowledge that he's active and he knows and he cares and he's, he's, he's sovereign, he's orchestrating.
Speaker 2:I was just talking to a guy earlier today. He told me this story about his grandson that told his dad he's four years old and he was telling his dad that God controls everything. God controls everything, the sun, the moon, everything. And the dad started teaching him about sovereignty, what the word sovereign means. So, of course, this, you know, young, young boy was like, ah, he's so confused. He's like, dad, god controls everything, right, it's just so sweet. But he, he, he's, he's in it all, he's in it all, and um.
Speaker 2:And so we wrestle, right, we wrestle. And so sometimes we wrestle against ourselves, sometimes we wrestle against humans. You know, I was just reading in Genesis about Jacob, you know, wrestling with the angel, wrestling with God for a blessing, for a blessing right, and he was not going to, I mean relentless, he was not going to give up, he was not going to give up, right. And so, you know, regardless of the fight we're in, right it's, it's not time to give up, like God wants us to continue to, to, to persist, to press on and press in to him over and over, and over and over again on our knees in prayer, over and over, and over and over again on our knees in prayer. You know, it's not the time to stop, it's not the time to cower, it's not the time to put our head in the sand, but to keep wrestling, to keep wrestling, and God honors it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I'm playing this out in my head and I have for, as I've mentioned, days and weeks Listening to God say stay right. There could be one of the hardest things, mark. Stay right there.
Speaker 2:Ouch.
Speaker 1:This is where I want you and the closest I've come to true surrender to. That is something like what I told you this morning and it sounds like this in my head All right, lord, I hear you. I'm open to the fact that this might be where you want me. I'm open to it, to the fact that this might be where you want me. I'm open to it. I'm scared. I'd rather not be here. As a matter of fact, if you want me to pivot, just let me know and I can make that pivot voice very loud.
Speaker 1:By the way, while God is telling me the truth, I'm going left, left, keep going, but I try to sit and listen to God and I'm looking for a way out. The truth is, I'd rather not. I want to lean in. I want to be a lean inner. I do In my heart. I want to be seen as a man willing to stay right where I am and learn. Whatever the fight I'm in, the wrestling match I'm in, I believe that my God has something good there for me. But, bro, I turn left in about a nanosecond. Often, I'm pretty settled in where I am today. I'm trying to look at this opposition in my life in a good way I'm standing up. I had to admit I'm shaky, shaky yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, and it's, it's. That's a? Um, I'm not sure that's a terrible place to be. No, I'm.
Speaker 1:I'm learning yeah.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:It's hard to say.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, yep, but you know what it it, it it. It's interesting because we're talking about being in the fight, we're talking about needing to wrestle and yet, at the same time, we're talking about surrender.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And so, typically, those two things are not put together in the same sentence, right, especially in a wrestling match. And so, um you know, I think it's we, we surrender to our own will and we keep wrestling with God.
Speaker 1:Yes, yeah.
Speaker 2:That's good.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's a good descriptor. Yeah, and there's, there's a good. I mean, I, you do this. We train, we do things to help ourselves, whether it's emotionally, physically, spiritually, et cetera. So, wrestling with God. I see him laughing, you know, I think he's kind of like you know, you hold the kid by the head as he flails. His arms can't reach you. What is that? What is that? There's a Broadway. Your arms too short to box with God. Right? Do you remember that? That actually was a play, but that's how I feel in it. But I have to admit, when I have a chance to talk to you or one of my other V2G brothers or someone that I'm close with, and play this out, I've never heard from anyone to look at me and go run. It's okay run.
Speaker 1:There's empathy, there's love, there's compassion. Right, there's all the things I need to build me up because, ultimately, the goal is to find some fruit here, right, some loves, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentle, right. Some fruit of the spirit in the wrestling and I wish it was a light switch. It was like I'm strong, I'm sleeping, I'm strong. Right, if I'm not sleeping, I'm strong. I don't have that switch.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, I I don't know if that switch exists. I mean, my goodness again, just in our humanity, I mean my goodness again, just in our humanity. I mean we check eBay. Yeah, I mean we might, you know, you might be able to, like, you know again, maybe ignore, you know, distract ourselves, you know, to a certain extent, yeah.
Speaker 2:Yep, um, but I mean when there's a, when the fight is real, you're like, this goes beyond my human strength, right, right, for better or worse. Right, like right now I'm launching C12 South Florida, Like the mountain in front of me is huge, it's beyond my human strength. It's incredibly exciting. It's not a crisis. I couldn't be more excited yet can't be done on my own strength. You, right now, you're in a different situation where that involves crisis. That's beyond your control, beyond human strength, right, and so you know, it's just.
Speaker 2:It's interesting that it's almost, you know, two sides of the same coin. And you know, we become completely reliant. You know, we become aware, aware that we can't do it, and reliant on God to move, because if he doesn't, if he doesn't right, then what? And there's serious stakes, serious implications, yes, if God fails to move, and that man that that, that is where you know, in the experiencing God, study, right, the black beat like it's a, it's a crisis, it's a crisis of faith. I don't to our knees and says, ok, lord, like, I surrender, I surrender to your will through these circumstances, whatever it is you're doing, I trust that you're at work. Stay on my knees and wrestle with you to move, and, and and move mightily in this situation for your glory and honor, through, through me, and I will do whatever it is you asked me to do, I will be. I am 100%, fully obedient and ready to move when you say move, to move when you say move.
Speaker 1:That's it. I'm just thinking it through. If I play this out, I spend many hours, many days saying Lord here.
Speaker 3:I am.
Speaker 1:Send me, lord, show me your face. Lord, right, I'm asking him, I'm inviting him in. Come on, let's go. I'm with you, I'm right. How often do you hear me full of passion and energy and hope for the world, and off I go and here's God, putting himself right in front of me, probably smiling, going. Mark, here I am, I'm right, I'm doing exactly what you asked. I'm in the middle of this mess and you need to turn to me now, now, when it's the hardest, now when you need to turn to me now, now when it's the hardest, now when you want to turn away here, here.
Speaker 2:I am, and what you just described was the fruit of the spirit. Right Now, all of a sudden, your desires are fully aligned with his and and, and none of it is within your control, and that is exactly where God wants us and that's exactly what we're talking about. That's the kind of wrestling, that, that that God's looking for, right. That those are the type of types of like faith, building faith, activating, you know, seasons of life that you know sanctify us, that draws near to him, that, that that that you know chip off areas of our heart that need to be chipped off, right, that humble us, that that bring us into alignment with his spirit. Like, yeah, jacked up, I mean listen. But when you're in crisis, you're like, how could this possibly be happening to me? Jacked up, I love it, listen. But when you're in crisis, you're like how could this possibly be happening to me, right?
Speaker 1:So you know, Well, ephesians 6.12, you know it and love it, for we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places. Right, the word calls us and reminds us. God knows, he knows exactly what I'm dealing with.
Speaker 1:He knows exactly what you're dealing with. Yeah, the fact that you've decided, steve Sargent, to put yourself in a position where the mountain is so big, it's impossible for you to ignore the power of God in it. Gee, that's what a coincidence. Not at all.
Speaker 2:Not at all, not not at all. And um, and you know, mate, listen, like I, I mean in all honesty you, and you know, other brothers in my life know that I love to live on the edge, right, so I mean that is it's no surprise that that I will put myself in this position. But when it's for God, oh man, I mean it's like 10 times more exciting, I mean a thousand times more exciting, and you know to, to be in a position where you know, and really everybody else knows, and you and you get to proclaim that there's no way, like, whatever happens, like this, this will either be the biggest mistake and most horrific decision of my life, right? Or like God is going to perform miracle upon miracle upon miracle, and I believe in my heart of hearts that's exactly what he's going to do. But but I and everybody else will know that it's only him, that it's only him, that I have nothing to do with it.
Speaker 1:And you can't say it enough.
Speaker 2:Right and like it's. That is just man. I'm so grateful to be in that spot, to be on that spot and, quite frankly, it's very freeing.
Speaker 1:I know I feel you and I'm watching you and it's. It's exciting for me to watch Rocket Sarge on another. You know launch pad, it really is. Do you know that? But I don't want to go into those details here.
Speaker 1:Justin says something really telling at the end of this devotional. He says in the okay, so what do I do now? Right, justin asks. And he says God doesn't always take opposition away, brother, because he's built you to conquer and not cower. He's given you everything you need.
Speaker 1:And spend time reading Ephesians 6, 10 to 17, which I just read out loud. So I say, praise God for giving me everything I need, that I should have more confidence in my God, whether I have it or not in myself. Meh, I'm less concerned about it even now than I was 30 minutes ago when we started or 26 minutes ago when we started now than I was 30 minutes ago when we started or 26 minutes ago when we started. But it is so freeing to know that I stand there with all of my heroes, both living today, my Bible heroes and my God, and dealing with whatever it is that's in front of me.
Speaker 1:I'm missing other challenges, by the way, because I've got a big one blocking my vision right now. There are plenty of little things going on it's tax time and all the other things in life that makes us. What am I going to do with my garden? This year I've got snow on the ground, so there's little challenges that I know God is in because they are fruitful no pun intended right right from the get go, but there's a big distraction in front of me. My God is in the middle of it and he's calling me to be the man that that my wife and boys and family need, and I'm just going to continue to be the best disciplined, passionate, supportive husband that I can be.
Speaker 2:Amen, amen, amen, which is exactly what he's called you to be, and so that's that's exactly. I mean, there, it is right, that is what we get to do. In the midst of you know, the fight is, is, is we, you know, by taking the gloves off in our flesh, we put them on in the spirit, that's good, by just loving, just loving and caring for and offering grace and listening, and all the things that maybe don't come very natural to us, especially when our backs against the wall, especially when crisis hits. But that's the opportunity that we have If, if, if, we're willing and able to surrender to our flesh and and fight, you know, for and with God, right To wrestle our way through that to his, his, his blessing, and the way that we do that is being in step and in sync with his spirit. And, um, man, that that's a, that's a life, well-lived, that's, you know, that's being in, in, in his will, in spite of our circumstances.
Speaker 1:Yeah, there's a there's adone good and faithful servant in there somewhere right Sarge.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's exactly right, brother, that is exactly right.
Speaker 1:And who doesn't. Who doesn't want to hear that? Here's a little tidbit I pulled off the web. I forget who said it and I apologize, but I've been praying an awful lot about this Matter of fact. Every time I open my eyes in the morning, same whether it's for you, for me, for the brothers that you know and I know and love and all the challenges in our lives. And this smart person said there's three potential answers to prayer. Yes, not. Yet I have something else in mind for you. I'm telling you. I have it written down here on my desk because I never want to forget it. I'm not saying there aren't more than three answers, that's not the point. But for me, three answers, that's not the point.
Speaker 1:But for me, keeping in mind that my father has never turned his back on me. I've turned my back on him, but he's the same and he says yes, he might say not yet and he might redirect me and I'm okay with all three.
Speaker 2:Yeah Well, amen, that's a good word right there. I'm okay with it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yep, so wrestling with God in the fight of our lives Funny, it sounds awfully big now that I think about it. Having not been in World War II or any of the other big conflagrations in our world, I know there are big fights. Some of these seem pretty big. They're personal, they're mine and yours. Right, they're ours, our personal fights.
Speaker 1:I chuckle at just thinking about God with me wrestling with God. You know the, the, the metaphor, metaphorically, just what am I doing? But I so love that he lets me play it out, that, like my God, has a playful spirit and lets me hit him in the legs. You know, as it were, um, that is comforting in some strange way, but, um, the part about this probably the best part for me is that I've had at least three men that I can talk to, that I've chosen to speak this out with, as I would most, any joy or challenge. But without authentic community as part of my principled life, the foundational things I count on, I can't imagine doing this. I can't imagine so. Hallelujah, thank you for being you and you other guys, if you're listening, you know who you are. Thank you for being you. I have brothers who are kind enough to listen to me, yeah, and occasionally share wisdom.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Perspective, Like I said, empathy, love, compassion, peace.
Speaker 2:Yeah, amen. So for all our listeners, if you're in, if you're in the fight of your life, no matter what you're facing no, you're not alone. Number one, and surround yourself with others. Get in community with others. Get in community with others who can lift you up, walk with you, support you, challenge you, equip you. This walk, this journey, is not meant to be done alone, but just know God is with you in the fight. Keep praying, keep wrestling and keep asking God to move. Until then, thank you for listening. If we can be of support for you, if, if, if we can pray for you, drop us a line, mark and I will commit to praying for you and uh, and walk with you however we can. Until then, peace, peace.
Speaker 3:Have you been up against something that was impossible for you to control or navigate? Did you see your life unraveling before your eyes and time was slipping through your fingers like a handful of sand? I would say that those moments are opportunities for us to lean into our loving Father in heaven, not because he will make everything play out the way we want them to, but because we will have our sovereign and holy Creator by our side, walking through that valley with us, and if we truly trust Him and His word, his truth, his promises, we will navigate that dark and difficult valley together. While God doesn't promise anyone what they want in their own human nature, he does promise that he is for us and not against us. He does promise that he came to give us life and to have it more abundantly.
Speaker 3:Our challenge is to remember that we are not omniscient. We don't know people's hearts. We don't know who is promised tomorrow. We don't know what God has planned for us to receive or sacrifice, and that's a very difficult place to be when we are not in relationship with God. Spending time with God, remembering who we are and, most importantly, remembering who he is, that's where we want to be. That's where I want to be Lean in and know that he is the great. I Am in and know that he is the great I am. Lord, please continue to use this podcast to impact the lives of all who listen. I ask that you would bring hope and healing to each and every one of them. Meet them right where they are and reveal yourself to them like only you can do. In Jesus' name amen.
Speaker 2:If you enjoyed today's episode, please share it and invite others to the Foxhole. You can find us wherever you download your favorite podcasts. Be sure to subscribe so you know when new episodes drop, and please rate us and comment there too, as it'll help us get found by others who could benefit. Find, follow and like us on your go-to social media networks by searching Foxhole Symphony or visit foxholesymphonycom to make it super easy to find us. Drop us a line with feedback, questions, topic requests. Who knows, maybe you'll be a guest on a future episode. In the meantime, prepare to move, embrace discomfort and just be you.
